OK so let’s dial it back a little bit today and talk about spring. It’s now spring in California and it has come in spite of the economy. The trees have never looked greener and the flowers are sprouting all around and showing off their colors as beautifully as any time in my life. No recession in nature that I can see.
Of course spring brings a few down sides like pollen. I can feel it making my throat a little raw and my eyes are a little gravelly, and sometimes I feel a little tired out too.
But the allure of spring weather overpowers my knowing that allergies wait for me out there. I can’t help getting on the bike and going or taking a nice long walk in the breezy yellow air. I pay for it of course, sneeze my nose off and eyes watering all the while admiring the deep blue of the sky background to flowers and trees and buildings washed clean in the winter rains.
But where is the old internal thrill, the adrenaline rush of the spring? Where has that gone I wonder sometimes? It was a feeling like the anticipation I felt as a kid about trick-or-treating on Halloween or on Christmas Eve or before asking a girl to dance. The feeling was an upwelling happiness that made me sort of giddy inside.
As I grow older I find that fewer and fewer things in my life produce those kinds of feelings. There’s a couple great lines in the old Eagle’s song “Desperado” that go something like, “You’re losing all your highs and lows, Ain’t it funny how the feeling goes away…” I know what the song means as I get older and it ain’t all that funny.
I miss the joy of spring; oh, I still appreciate its beauty and its promise and the temporary nature of it, but I simply don’t feel the inner upward rush that it used to produce.
My Uncle used to say that getting old isn’t for sissies…I hope that stem cell research finds the key to keeping alive that youthful joy of spring even if everything else ages, that would be a great gift.